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At a loss by ~FrostedWind:iconFrostedWind:



I'm at a loss
I don't know how to deal
With this confusion, emotion and pain
It just feels wrong, when it felt so right before, and still does?

I don't know what to tell you
My heart exposed for you to see
But can I let you see it like this?
I fear what you find may drive you away...

I'm so scared
So scared to lose you
You're really the best thing that's ever happened to me
You give me reason to be so amazingly happy, but now this?

I feel alone
For the first time since our first meeting, I find myself holding back
Is that a sign, an omen?
Comfort has never been an issue before, is it really now?

I don't know what you will, would think
Would you hold me in your arms, and reassure me?
Or would you smile awkwardly and fumble for a response
I thought, still think, that you're perfect for me

Is this fear irrational?
Do these tears have no reason?
My heart should be exposed for you to see
But at a distance, I shelter it,
Needlesly?
©2006-2008 ~FrostedWind
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Submitted: January 16, 2006
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Author's Comments

I really don't know what to say about this piece... It's pretty raw, really, I just wrote, not even taking my usual considerations into consideration... Wow am I ever gone today :(

I'm not sure what's up with me, I seem to be in a spot of emotional turmoil, and it's really doing a number on me. I'm in a relationship with an amazing, sweet, intelligent, wonderful guy at the moment, and have been for almost 3 months now. Up to this point it's been the best relationship I've EVER been in, bar none; our comfort level is nothing short of amazing, we have so much in common, he's so supportive, and everything has just fallen into place so perfectly between us. Sudenly, however, he's beginning to seem a bit distant. Maybe it's just my imagination, maybe he just needs a bit of time to himself, I really don't know, but I'm worried sick about it, and I'm so afraid to talk to him, because if he does need his space, I'd be afraid he'd see me as too needy and it could severely hurt our relationship... I'm so bad with these things. And I'm so afraid to lose him. Ugh...

I hope someone can identify with this anyway, because it didn't do much to help me :(

P.S. Sorry for being so emo... I hope I'll be back to my mostly fun-loving self soon :S

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~jacksprat:iconjacksprat: Jan 16, 2006, 10:01:20 PM
I would suggest maybe making the lines a little more fragmented, maybe even moving the text around like they do with echo poems to make it more confused.

--
Life goes on until you're dead.

Groups I'm in: Only two, ArtMonkeysAnonymous [link] and fiona-apple [link]
Jack's Prints! [link]
~FrostedWind:iconFrostedWind: Jan 22, 2006, 8:04:27 PM
I see what you're saying... I don't think I'd want to change it, though, it wasn't meant as a serious poetic piece... It's just what came out when I was writing...

--
When nothing else makes you feel right, write...
~FrostedWind:iconFrostedWind: Jan 22, 2006, 8:05:06 PM
Will try ;) Everything's turned out well since...

--
When nothing else makes you feel right, write...
~FrostedWind:iconFrostedWind: Jan 22, 2006, 8:05:08 PM
Will try ;) Everything's turned out well since...

--
When nothing else makes you feel right, write...
~jacksprat:iconjacksprat: Jan 23, 2006, 1:10:14 PM
Has the situation improved at all since you wrote it?

--
Life goes on until you're dead.

Groups I'm in: Only two, ArtMonkeysAnonymous [link] and fiona-apple [link]
Jack's Prints! [link]
~FrostedWind:iconFrostedWind: Jan 25, 2006, 5:13:58 PM
Very much so :) As per usual, I was flipping out over nothing... I talked to him about it later, and he said next time I felt that way, I should just talk to him, and all would be well...

--
When nothing else makes you feel right, write...
~jacksprat:iconjacksprat: Jan 25, 2006, 11:07:15 PM
Glad to hear it. I'll need to write something good in the nearesque future, it's a very satisfying excercise, or can be anyway.

--
Life goes on until you're dead.

Groups I'm in: Only two, ArtMonkeysAnonymous [link] and fiona-apple [link]
Jack's Prints! [link]